Virginia was a lot lizard from F.L..A
She had a compound fracture in the trunk
It started when she ran away
Thumbs out on the interstate
She hitched a ride to misery


Mr. Whirly had a catastrophic incident
He fell into the city by the bay
He liquidated his estate
Now he sleeps upon the Haight
Panhandling misery


And he's gonna get high, high, high
When he's low, low, low
The fire burns from better days
And she screams, "Why oh why"
I said, “I don't know”
The catastrophic hymns from yesterday
Of misery


The Vinnie was a hustler out of Amsterdam
He ran the drug cartel in Tinseltown
They found him in a Cadillac
Bludgened with a baseball bat
In the name of misery


Let Gina hits the road to New York City
Mysteriously the night Vinnie croaked
She stopped in Vegas to elope
With Virgina and the Dope
That kissed the bride eternally


And they're gonna get high, high, high
When they're low, low, low
The fire burns from better days
And she screamed, "Why oh why"
I said, “I don't know”
The catastrophic hymns from yesterday
Of misery


Well, hell hounds on your trail now once again, boy
It's gropin' on your leg until it sleeps
The emptiness will fill your soul with sorrow
Because it's not what you make it's what you leave


And we're gonna get high, high, high
When we're low, low, low
The fire burns from better days
And she screams, "Why oh why"
I said, “I don't know”
The catastrophic hymns from yesterday
Of misery